gratitude – L. Ryan Storms

Smooth Sailing

February 17, 2023 L. Ryan StormsLeave a comment

The problem with the type of cancer that can be managed-but-not-cured is that you never quite know when to update the masses that the patient is on an upswing and doing well. It’s occurred to me recently that I’m always quick to let everyone know when we’re riding that cancer train, but not always quick to update when the ride has gotten a little smoother.

Time to stop talking in metaphors, I suppose.

Nate is doing well. One and a half years after two very rough liver embolizations, and fifteen months of monthly Sandostatin injections with little to no side effects, I feel like it might finally be safe to say (yikes, is it ever safe to say?) that he’s doing well. The numerous cancerous tumors in his liver have shrunk significantly in size, he’s had an increase in energy, and he’s been active and engaged with life. Fishing? Every chance he gets, no matter the weather. Ice skating? Frequently. Good thing older kiddo is taking lessons and wants to be at the rink as much as humanly possible. Hockey games? Attending whenever he can. Work? Oh, yeah, I guess he’s been doing a lot of that, too. (But who wants to hear about work?)

He’s living. And for that, my friends, we are overcome with gratitude.

Additionally, as of this week, he’s been given official disability status as a veteran from his exposure to burn pits in Kuwait in the 90s, which means we now get financial assistance from the government in managing his cancer. This is exceptionally helpful as every injection (you know, the injections he’ll get monthly for the rest of his life, those injections?) costs $27,000 before insurance is factored in, which means we meet our deductible every year in January. So this turn of events is a welcome one.

Is it the government admitting, “Hey, sorry we’re probably responsible for your cancer?” Or perhaps it’s just their way of saying, “We might have had something to do with this. Oops.” Or maybe it’s, “Damn, this diagnosis sucks and we’re sorry it happened. Thanks for serving your country; we’ve got your back.”

I don’t know. I don’t think we’ll ever know. Regardless of the meaning behind it, the financial help is significant and we are positively, incredibly, overwhelmingly grateful for it. (Did I include enough adverbs there? Writers aren’t supposed to use them, right? Well, I’m really grateful. So there.)

So that’s the update. Nate is doing well. I typed it. Despite my fear of jinxing everything, I put it out there for all to see. Because you’ve all been with us on this journey. And you deserve to know. That bumpy train ride seems to have taken us to a port. And the seas seem fairly calm. Smooth sailing. At least for a while.

Thank you for being here with us, friends. Your love and your support has always kept us going.

The Little Things

March 29, 2019 L. Ryan StormsLeave a comment

Hey, readers! Be forewarned. I’m about to get really honest.

Books are hard.

They’re hard to write, hard to edit, hard to pitch, and hard to release into the world. Did I revise my book so it’s the best it can be? Did I revise so much that I lost the essence? Am I ready? Am I marketing my work enough? Too much? Pushing too hard? Annoying all the people who know me? Annoying the people who don’t?

It’s really difficult to be in a mental space that simultaneously tells me I’m doing too much and not nearly enough all at once. And when things get overwhelming, it’s the most unexpected gesture that makes a difference.

I received an email the other day that quite nearly took my breath away. What was in it, you ask? Was it from an agent wanting to represent my work? Was it Hollywood banging on my door for a movie deal? Was it Publisher’s Clearing House telling me I wouldn’t ever have to work again?

No.

And no.

affection-appreciation-art-424517 It was…a request. A request from someone who doesn’t know me, has never met me, hasn’t yet read my book, but wants a signed copy of it and asked if I would be doing signings. And so, Shannon, if you happen to read this, know you made my day, my week, and maybe even my month.

This debut author says to you, “Thank you.”

From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

While you’re here: Have you added A Thousand Years to Wait to your Goodreads list yet?

The Value of One Year

June 5, 2018June 4, 2018 L. Ryan Storms3 Comments

Can you measure the worth of a year? How do you set the price? In dollars? In euros? In pesos? Can you put a price on it at all?

When you get a cancer diagnosis, you find out just how much your time with loved ones is really worth, and just how much more of that time you want. One year ago, we found out.

One year ago, my husband was diagnosed with a rare type of pancreatic cancer. One year ago, the doctors saved his life.

And mine.

If you want to know the value of a year, ask anyone who has faced this kind of diagnosis or worse. We were lucky. His was only a stage 1B. Prognosis is good. Our future is optimistic.

But that doesn’t stop me from asking ‘What if?’ a hundred-thousand times a day. What if things had been different?

So if you want to know what a year is truly worth, spend an afternoon with a cancer survivor and ask them to share their experience. And never take for granted another year, another day, another minute, again.

June 5, 2017 changed our lives forever. I have felt a level of gratitude every day of this past year greater than I could ever have imagined. If you want to know the value of one year, simply ask yourself, “What if?”

Storms full page program ad for Dance Centers — The ad we placed in this year’s dance program.